England 0 Scotland 1

Wembley, 1999

Don Hutchison - English brown trouser creator

So, the "Battle of Britain" came and went. Once again "jammy" England emerged as victors over the piece, but it was nearly worth it just to witness the English brown-trouser themselves at Wembley.

We so nearly wiped that smug, arrogant smirk off their faces once and for all. That one will live long in the memory, and once again the Tartan Army emerged with their heads held high and their reputation as the World's greatest fans enhanced. Euro 2000 was undoubtedly all the poorer without their presence in place of "les ooligans".

The bravehearts in blue came within a whisker of becoming legends, but alas, ..........the difference between immortality and not is the merest width of a Seaman's fingertip. How I detest that man.

The battles on the pitch, however, were as nothing compared to the fiasco of Flodden Field proportions that was "The great Play-Off ticket scandal of 99". What a stramash, as dear old Arthur Montford would say, that turned out to be. Poor show chaps. I thought we'd learned something from the lessons of the 98 World Cup organisation.

Still, looking on the bright side, at least we didn't have to suffer the ticketing arrangements for Euro 2000 which, by all accounts was yet another complete shambles. Will they ever learn? I doubt it. And in 2 years time we'll go through the whole scenario again.

The Football Authorities (National and FIFA) will claim it's not their responsibility and tens of thousands of people will be left wondering whether they will ever get to matches they are flying halfway around the world to see.

And while these same authorities so helpfully advise the footballing public not to travel without tickets, what are people supposed to do about a holiday that requires not inconsiderable planning ahead? Pop into their local travel agent the week before a major sporting tournament and see if there's any cheap day returns to Tokyo for a family of five on the day of the match?

It's a bloody nonsense.