Start of day - The Hootsmon is the middle pile Midday - the other piles get smaller but the Hootsmon remains constant Evening - and only the Hootsmon remains in any quantity End of the day - Proof that putting CRAP into newspapers means that they remain widely available for purchase

Many Scots will have been completely unaware that over the last few months they have been living through the introduction of one of the greatest scientific and technical breakthroughs to have hit the world of newspapers in the last 150 years.

Observant Scots will have noticed that no matter what time they shopped at their local newsagent, supermarket, garage or other retail outlet, substantial piles of The Hootsmon newspaper were always available for purchase.

While available copies of rival publications would dwindle during the day, The Hootsmon pile remained at a constant high level of availability.

During the past week, a spokesman for rival publication The Daily Rectal, claimed that they had been monitoring deliveries of newspapers to retail outlets. The spokesperson said that there had been no increase in the frequency of deliveries of The Hootsmon, despite the obviously high availability of the paper. “We are monitoring the situation and are keen to know how they are doing this”.

However by the weekend it was clear that new technology was at the centre of the mystery. The Hootsmon has been printing newspapers which have been produced using Creative Reproductive Asymmetrical Paper (CRAP) techniques. “By injecting substantial quantities of CRAP into our papers, we are able to maintain the retail availability that other newspapers can only dream of” an insider at the paper told FirstFoot.